Home Opinion and Features Why I’d rather pay the car guard than the taxman

Why I’d rather pay the car guard than the taxman

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I begrudge the taxman every cent I pay, because he's not using it well

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I sometimes think the car guards in the parking area of our local shopping mall do a more efficient job than all the thousands of workers in the Receiver of Revenue’s department put together.

The tax people are entrusted with the job of taking money from the rich and giving it to the poor. They are supposed to be the modern day Robin Hoods. But I wonder how much of that money actually reaches the poor.

Once the tax people have our hard-earned cash in their coffers, they need to pay each other salaries, rent offices, buy tons of stationery, run fleets of official vehicles, pay electricity bills, hire office cleaning staff and pay for computer updates and so on.

What’s left over after all that is handed to high-living politicians, a slew of government employees and, finally, to the poor in the form of pensions and grants.

Compare this with the money I pay the car guard every day. He wastes none of it on non-productive things like office rent or vehicle maintenance or stationery. It goes straight into his pocket and then home to feed his wife and children, buy the kids’ school clothes and pay for their education. I believe almost 100 percent of the money I pay him is used for the purpose for which it was intended.

Probably at least half the taxes I pay go into administrative costs, so the poor lose out rather heavily. The car guard doesn’t lie to me in order to take my money. It’s an honest deal. I know where it’s going and he doesn’t pretend he’s going to use it to save the world from drought or corruption.

I can’t say the same for the taxman. He tells me he is educating the country’s children, while half of them crowd into ill-maintained schools and are not supplied with adequate facilities or taught by properly qualified teachers.

The taxman promises public transport so the poor can get to work, but the trains don’t work, and even if they did, it wouldn’t help because nobody moves the sand off the railway lines.

I begrudge the taxman every cent I pay, because he’s not using it well.

I am happy to pay the parking attendant because I am free to pay what I think he deserves, and he doesn’t try to con me with false promises.

Maybe I should write a letter to the Gupta brothers suggesting they appoint my local car guard as the next minister of finance. Or are they not in charge of cabinet appointments any more? It’s so hard to keep up these days.

Last Laugh

The coach was getting very depressed about the abysmal record of his team, so he called them all into the locker room and said: “Now look, you okes. It seems we have to go back to basics and start right from the beginning again.”

Then he held up a ball and said: “This thing is a rugby ball. You can pass it or you can kick it.”

One of the players put up his hand and said: “Hold on coach. Don’t go so fast.”